I HATE MY BEST FRIEND!!!! YOU MIGHT ASK WHY?! EVERYONE SEEMS TO LIKE HER MORE THAN ME!!! WHENEVER WE GO OUT ALL OFF THE GUYS LOOK AT HER, TALK TO HER, GET HER DIGITS. ME? THEY IGNORE ME. LIKE I'M NOT THERE SEOMTIMES. IT'S NOT MY FRIENDS FAULT BUT I FEEL LIKE IT IS. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BREAK THINGS OFF WITH HER? I DO NOT WANT HER TO KNOW WHY I DON'T WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH HER ANYMORE.

You're going to break up with your best friend because guys talk to her more than they talk to you?

How long have you been friends?

Steff

Bitchie,

It's understandable that you might feel uncomfortable around your friend in this situation. In situations like these, it's hard not to want to simply walk away from everything, thereby removing any external sources of discomfort. The problem with this way of doing things is that you may walk away from relationships of value because of something that isn't even their fault. Your friend isn't doing this "to" you--you're simply choosing to take it personally.

It's your perspective that is causing you pain. Think about this. If you're going out with the attitude that you're not that cute, that no one will talk to you, and that your friend will get all the attention, it could affect your behavior. When you're lacking confidence, you might shy away from reaching out to the people around you. You may not even realize that you're not smiling and that you don't look very friendly. If you're sitting in the corner looking unhappy, people aren't going to want to talk to you--not because you're not attractive or interesting, but because you just don't look like you're having much fun. Try going out with your friend and adopting a different attitude. Approach people who look interesting, smile, and focus more on having a good time. The less you focus on whether or not people are paying attention to you and focus on having fun instead, the more fun you'll have--and the more people will want to be around you.

Hope this helps a little!
Nan Little
123 Feel Better Wellness Adivisor