My name is Aisha, I'm sixteen years old.

I found this forum when I was researching anxiety disorders, trying to figure out what exactly is wrong with me.

I went to the doctor last week because of heart palpitations and chest pains, which i'm getting all day and all night. Thing is, I couldn't bring myself to tell my doctor about the panic things i have. Because I'm terrified that it's nothing. At the same time I'm very much terrified it's something.

I'm just scared, all the time, worried, about EVERYTHING, and I have a chronic fear of silence, I've researched this too because I don't know if anyone has it, and apparently , it is called Sedatephobia, but I have yet to find anyone else with this, which makes me feel incredibly alone, because I feel like I'm the only person in the world who has this bizzarre fear.

It controls my life, to the point where its disabling. Silent places make me incredibly anxious, and if i have to endure silence in a public or social place for any amount of time, my heart starts to beat violently, my mouth goes dry, i start to shake all over, and i cant speak. sometimes i can hide this from others but more often i cant, and people think i'm really weird now, it just makes me feel even more alone.

Mostly i'm terrified that silence will make me have a panic attack in a public place, or in school, where classes full of people get dead silent, i cant focus, on anything, im falling behind terribly in school, and im so scared of disappointing my parents. I keep having to bolt from a room just to escape the silence, its so consuming, i can't breathe. I always escape to the nearest public bathroom to try and calm down, but i will start to hyperventilate and my heart is going a mile a minute, my heads buzzing, its so disembodying, like getting pulled out of my body, and i start hysterically crying, and i have to skip class till i calm down, then im just scared the rest of the day.

Sometimes if i'm asked to read in class or something, my mouth goes dry and i feel the silence, and myheart starts to violently beat so i cant talk, and i cant read, i just can shake my head, and my teachers sometimes force me to anyway, and i talk like someone with a speech impediment because im breathing so deeply and i cant focus on the words, and im so embarrassed that everyones eyes are on me. It's horrible, and all I can seem to do is skip classes where i might have to read, or where it will be really silent, because the dread of these two things is controlling my life.

i'm just feeling like a huge failure, and constantly down on myself about this.

my doctor said my heart seemed fine, but she's sending me for bloodwork at a hospital. she said shed ask me how i was feeling emotionally after that.

I know this post probably wont make any sense and probably wont be read. I'm seriously thankful to anyone whos read this far. I just really want to know, what i have, and how anxiety disorders are diagnosed, are they diagnosed by your family doctor? if not, what kind of a doctor do they refer you to? are you able to ask for this referral, and can you go by yourself if you're under 18 years of age?

I would seriously be so thankful of any advice anyone could offer.
Thank you so much.

~Aisha

one piece of advice i can give u is to talk about it with ur parents. i had something similar going on with myself a couple of years ago. it wasnt exactly the same as far as the symptoms were concerned, but i used to feel a lot like u do now. when i was 16 i thought about talkin it out with my parents but i didt do so for many reasons, i didt know how they would react and all sorts of other social reasons. i am 18 and i m currently enrolled at a university, my parents have a lot of expectations from me but due to these symptoms i feel like i m not being able to perform to the levels i notmally would have. i told my parents about this a couple of months ago and they were very supportive. talking about it really helped but since im in the middle of my studies and live away from home and due to this being uni (very stressful) i hardly have any time for any sort of medical intercations with a doctor frequently. till this day i regret not talking about this with my parents earlier. if i had done thi earlier then my life would have been a lot easier. n i know this might sound a little philosophical but trust me the one of hte many ways u can help urself with this situation is to " take everything easily, take things the way they come. dont try to change anything unless you are realy sure about that". trust me keeing things simple is the best way one can go about living their lives. in ur case i would definately recommend that u talk to ur family about ur situation freely about ur situation no matter how hard it is. trust me it'l all be worth it. and then u shud talk about this to ur doctor, many a times one doctor can not always provide u with the best advice and u might want to consider various opinions from other doctors. it happend to me so i would definately recommend u do that .
and thats pretty much all i can tell u
i noe its not a lot but i hope this helped.
JT

Hi Aisha,

My daughter had palpitations and a rapid pulse when she was a year older than you, and a freshman in college. Her situation was simply from too much coffee and not enough exercise.

I'm sorry you're having such a bad time and you should explain to your parents that this has been interfering with your ability to function. I hope your test results are fine. Doctors are very understanding, so when you meet with yours the next time, simply try explaining things to her exactly as you have here. Just pretend you're talking to your best friend and open up to her about everything.

Hey, a tip for the next time you have to speak in front of class, picture everyone in the room in their underwear. Keep smiling and good luck. Things will be improving for you.
To me, Silence Is Golden. I hope that some day it will be for you, too!

Oh, and, Aisha, keep yourself hydrated. Dehydration can make you feel pretty lousy, and if you're crying a lot, you're losing precious fluids that need replenished. Not drinking enough water can give people heart palpitations, too, even in the absence of anxiety.

thank you so much for both of your suggestions, ill really take these on board as it seems youve both had experience in this sort of thing. thank you very much, i really hope youre both well.

Dear Aisha,
My name is Rhianon and I also share Sedatephobia. I'm fifteen and have had that for a long time. Though i don't get chest pains i do hyperventilate when i'm suck in similar situations. I find that taking tests in class are also hard because it causes focus and silence. I have ADD and ADHD, sometimes i think those play into what happens to me but i doubt they are. I have fainted and passed out because of my phobia and i find that my thoughts race dramatically. My heart beats abnormally with my ADD and when i'm placed in a quiet room my heart speeds up, my vision gets bleary and i can't breathe very well. Of course for me this is after a little while sitting in the room. I found that listening to music of any kinds with a fan running lets me sleep and when in school to sing a little tune or find something to entertain my mind. When i have to read, i am the same, i can't focus on the words and i end up making a fool out of myself. Sadly, i do not know a way to fix that. I just wanted to tell that you aren't alone, and would you be as kind as to tell me where you found the stuff for your research. If you need to e-mail me to discuss anything my address is
iluvdoga@hotmail.com
~Rhi~

I THINK THIS WILL HELP. GIVEN AT THE TRY


MARK OSBORN

Comprehensive resources for those looking for recovery from addiction. <a href="http://www.addictionrecovery.net">http://www.addictionrecovery.net</a>

I know your feelings aisha, even you are suffering with disorders but you shouldn't loose your bravety, and I really appreciate your positive attitude that you have

May God bless you my child.

John

Opiate Addiction

I am new here, and perhaps nobody would like to hear this,,but for an inetrim fix, get a doctor to prescribe you Ativan, Lorazepam in the generic name,,it will help you tremendously, You have tp start somewhere, even if it is a prescription drug, then you will have the means to try and control it in other ways. It is a mild sedative, that will calm you down and help you think better, and as I said, will help you explore more alternative methods if you want..

I am in a similar situation, I have a subconsious fear of being in large groups of people. I have attacks like you describe especially the night before i have to go to a public place. It starts with heavy breathing and then develops into sweating and even crying. I was at frst reluctant to see a counselor because i thought my riends and family would think im crazy, but im very glad that i did. According to my counselor, very many people have conditions like what we have. You really arent crazy.
My advice is to see someone, your school probably has a counselor, who can help you get to the bottom of this. They will help you and give you methods and tools you can use to avert these situations in the future.
People may not agree with me on this one, but God is the ultimate counselor. Ask him to help you out and bring comfort to your mind and body.